Moms have a tendency to worry about their children – in all seasons of life.
I remember when I was a mom to little kids, I assumed my older empty nest friends didn’t have to worry about their children any more. I looked forward to that freedom I would experience. And then my kids grew up and left home and I still struggle with worry.
It’s a real bummer.
Most all moms must decide how to deal with worry … there are ways to combat that annoying mind gripper!
Here is a Bible verse worth memorizing!
[verse reference=”Philippians 4:4-7″]Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.[/verse]
You would think that by now I would have learned to trust my kids to the Lord–to release them with great abandonment into His care.
Not so, I still have to work at it!
No matter your season, all moms wear the hat of Mom, and for at least 20 years I have spent lots of emotional energy in worrying and countless hours praying and trusting.
Here are some tips to fight worry!
- Recognize how easy it is to let your imagination conjure up false fears.
- Share your concern with a friend and have her pray for your child for a specific period of time (like every day for a week).
- Recall specific examples of how God has been faithful to you and to your child in the past. One of the advantages of being Mom is that we’ve lived long enough to have many stories of His faithfulness to tell.
- Get involved in an activity that occupies your mind and your energy.
- Remember that God is bigger than anything that your child is facing. He knows what is going on and He is still in charge.
- Say God’s character traits out loud.
The very best advice I can give you sweet mom, is encourage you (and myself) to fight against that tendency to worry by reading God’s word and letting His blessed assurance wash over you.
When worry grips…pray.
You will learn, as I have, that His peace truly does transcend all understanding.
Susan Yates has written thirteen books and has spoken nationally and internationally on the subject of marriage, parenting and women’s issues for many years. For 11 years she was a regular columnist on parenting for Today’s Christian Woman magazine. Susan is the mother of five and has 21 grandchildren, including a set of quads. She is devoted to sharing her wisdom and experience with moms and wives and is selflessly available to those in need. Susan has been a mom for 40 years, she and John have been married for 43 years.
Thank you so much for your honesty Susan. I know as Christians we are to now trust God when it comes to our children. We aren't supposed to be worrying all the time. But as you said, for 20 years we were mom and you just can't flip a switch and turn it off. I'm sure God understands. I think that I did a much better job in the earlier days in dealing with "letting go". I think now that they are really in the grown-up world and life changing decisions are being made, I am really, really struggling to let go. There are many decisions that are being made that are not sinful–but still could cause so much heartache in their lives. I am now trying to focus on suffering and how it allows us to have a closer relationship with the Lord. So I am trying to remember that when one of my children is suffering pain over issues in life–having a stillborn baby, trouble with a job, bad decisions in her romantic life, etc.
wow, I didn't think this phase was going to be so hard. It's not that I want them all back in the nest. It just seems that there is alot of pain in their lives. I am working on one issue which is having healthy boundaries when it comes to hearing about marriage problems and other areas where they desire to talk with me about, but it's not really healthy for either of us. I am really struggling with that.
Hey Cindy,
Thanks so much for sending in a comment. We love to hear from folks!I appreciate your vulnerability. You are so wise in drawing boundaries in what your kids share with you. Often it's best to encourage them to see a counselor or find an older same sex mentor in the church they attend. One of my main prayers for my kids is for mentors!
Bless you!
susan